Friday, June 18, 2010
TOP, a Boy Like a Flower, A Man Like a Weed
Posted on 10:17 PM by kpop bff
Before a flower, now a weed,” this phrase was on my mind as I was on my way to interview TOP. It may have been because I could remember TOP’s performance on MBC “College Music Festival” from two years ago. TOP had performed Craig David’s ‘Rise & Fall’ with Kim Hyun Joong, and ‘before a flower, now a weed’ was a verse in his rap. “The homework is a subject on time / you can’t be distracted for even a moment, it’s prideful / if anything, red hot youth is courageous / before a flower, now a weed.”
Rise & fall, before and after, and flower and weed. This rapper was able to show off a self-composed rap on stage with his best friend outside of Big Bang, and show a different a side of himself despite being in a largely popular idol group. He had gained more experience performing underground rather than as a trainee in YG Entertainment (YG), and though he debuted as a member of an idol group, in the documentary series following Big Bang’s debut, he wore an expression of worry about not being able to dance instead of one filled with confidence. The reason for TOP fans’ mania as he performed alongside Uhm Jung Hwa was not because he had donned a sleek suit and had seduced them with the words, “The girls here see my gestures and feel the attraction.” The highlight came soon after when he proclaimed, “Where could truth go,” and “Sometimes you lose yourself as you get pulled along, where is there such a thing as a smooth life.”
24-year-old Choi Seung Hyun, protecting his heart
Of course, you could say everything is for the image-making of this idol star. Or you could say that it’s just a short verse from a rap. You could say that his listening to classical music in order to find that moment to commit to his character Oh Jang Bum of Into the Gunfire was all a useless front. But where could truth go. You can’t make up a fake image, not only for a repetitious interview that lasted for days, but one that has an attitude that doesn’t want to give conventional answers. His effort to answer all questions sincerely and share his personal stories was sometimes to the point where the interview had to be paused for a moment as he fell deep into thought. The conversation with this idol in his twenties, who was able to share that he was emotionally lonely as a child, that because he was a wanderer he enjoys collecting figurines since they are steadfast, and that there had been a time when he would sugarcoat himself because he was afraid the public would dislike him, was fascinating rather than fresh. Like a flower blooming in a field of weeds, for the past two years he had been protecting his heart amidst his activities in Korea and Japan, with singing and acting.
And so when TOP describes acting as “a way to find myself,” as he did with rapping, it doesn’t sound like something he says to sugarcoat himself. His character Chae Moo Shin of KBS “I Am Sam” was a slick high school student who was good at both fighting and school work. But TOP portrayed Chae Moo Shin as a shy boy, unable to freely speak to the girl he liked and unable to freely participate during class. The image of Chae Moo Shin, who expressed himself with rap rather than with words, overlaps with that of TOP in his teens, as he sat at his desk writing rap lyrics in anxiety. Just like Big Bang’s TOP can be considered an artificial character made up of the ideals of rapper Choi Seung Hyun, he played the part of Vic of KBS “IRIS” as if he were an artificial character that could be seen in A Clockwork Orange. Of course, there’s no need to make a fuss saying his acting is better than that of the pros, or that he has a tremendous talent. But there’s also no need to think of his acting as just an idol’s side job.
Whether it be acting or rapping, where could TOP go
And so, apart from criticism or controversy about films, TOP, who plays the part of student solider Oh Jang Bum, shows one of the most exciting moments of his personal career in Into the Gunfire. Not Big Bang but by himself, not with a short rap but in a two-hour long film that centers around him, he is not idol star TOP but a soft and delicate flower that boldly opens up after looking inward for awhile. A story of a young boy, who transforms into a soldier that fires a gun without rest due to a war, is pretty typical. But in Into the Gunfire, the moment where Oh Jang Bum is most noticeable is not at the end when he becomes a war hero as he fires at North Korean soldiers, but when he wears an expression of despair as he is thrown in the middle of a war with bombs detonating at his side. The transformation of an introverted teenage boy, who is unable to say a single word to the nurse taking care of him, into a lieutenant that leads the student soldier troops is reminiscent of TOP, who had put up with anxious teenage years before becoming a top star in his twenties. In Into the Gunfire, TOP’s fans will be able to clearly feel his hardships come through, and everyone else will be able to see a flower-like smile from TOP, who seemed like he fit into a weed-like image.
Obviously, Into the Gunfire won’t give TOP completion or a moment of reaching his peak. It took a long time for him to show himself as Big Bang’s rapper, through various solo stages, and now through his three works in acting. And TOP recently released a teaser of his solo album, in which he is wearing a suit and is surrounded by girls. Now, he is going from actor Choi Seung Hyun back to rapper TOP. But whether it be acting or rapping, where could TOP go. As time goes on, he is slowly showing more of himself that is neither rapper, nor actor, Choi Seung Hyun, nor TOP. Portraying self-written lyrics that are delicate as a flower with an image that is like a persistent weed.
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credits:
Source: 10.asiae.co.kr / bigbang updates
Translation: seungie@tumblr
Hara
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